Living Life To The Full, With A Sugar Free Werther’s Original.

So today is the first day where I sat down with absolutely no idea what I was going to write.

I figure that’s okay, it’s bound to happen, but I still wanted to write anyway. I wanted to write because it makes me happy.

So I had a think. And I realised this is actually pretty exciting! This could go just about anywhere, and get all kinds of super crazy in the process! (Then I remembered I’m Claire, and deep down I’m actually quite boring, so it probably won’t be all that crazy after all) but either way, whether crazy or not, I’m still going to write something.

So I started looking around for some inspiration. I thought I could perhaps try to spin a tale about the guy in Tesco buying sushi as part of his meal deal, and how I inherently knew his afternoon would be ruined by such an insubordinate choice. He could have had the lunch hour of his life if he’d picked up the BLT on the next shelf over, but with the sushi? Not so much. But then maybe he’s only made this choice because it’s his New Year’s Resolution to lose weight by giving up yummy food. Maybe he’s just favouring it on this occasion because he’s still a little conscious of his festive podge (hey – it happens to the best of us) and it means his diet has become a sad stream of celery, green juice and sushi. Or maybe – scary thought – maybe, he’s one of those pretentious people who eats sushi purely to make the grand metaphorical statement that he’s far more culturally well-rounded than the rest of us (because nobody could seriously choose sushi for the taste. Especially the pre-packed Tesco kind.) If that’s the case, and he really is trying that hard to be pretentious, I certainly can’t make him the primary subject of one of my stories. So yeah, I should probably move on to find new inspiration…

So then I thought I could perhaps write about something topical, like, I don’t know, the new pound coin (is there really any point?), or Celebrity Big Brother (again, is there really any point?) but I figured that since I don’t really keep up to date with the news these days (a deliberate choice which I’m sure I’ll share with you at some point) I’m not all that qualified to sit here and comment on current affairs. Maybe I could be a complete renegade and write about politics- but, yeah, that’s kind of a globally sore subject at the moment. So, yeah. Erm. Yeah. Back to the drawing board…

So then I thought I could just keep it simple and tell you about my day… Then I laughed out loud and figured that would probably lose more readers than if I went with the political propaganda idea. Because the truth is my day wasn’t particularly interesting. The truth is the happiest part of my day was eating a sugar free Werther’s Original.
It was in that moment that I finally got my epiphany, and I suddenly realised exactly how to provide deeper meaning to what started out as quite a nonsensical post. I had to make a real example of my uninteresting day to illustrate that sometimes life can be pretty dull. That’s okay. Not every day is a going to be a fabulous whirlwind, and if I sat here and pretended that it was it would kind of go against what – I guess – is my impromptu overall message here. Having a space on the internet, even a teeny tiny space like mine, can be quite powerful. If you use that space to try and pretend that life is like a non-stop holiday (when in reality there are many days when the only exciting thing you’ll do is eat a sugar free Werther’s Original) you’ll be doing that annoying thing of only showing the edited highlights of your life. You’ll trick people into thinking you’re more exciting than you are, and you might just make some people feel pretty rubbish about their own lives in the process. That’s not okay.

So yeah, it might be a bit of a stretch, but that’s my message and I’m sticking to it. It probably definitely won’t be the most profound thing you’ll ever read, but I’m ultimately happy to have found a moral (albeit quite a flimsy one) to a story which I didn’t think would even have a clear ending – nevermind a moral. Surely I deserve points for that? But then maybe I don’t. Maybe I should have just stayed silent on the blogging front until I knew I had something useful to say – rather than wittering on and ending up with something that is perhaps the written equivalent of small talk? But I want to small talk with you. In fact, I really want to small talk with you.  And – since I now have a great idea for another good post, but fear that I’ve already waffled on too much in this one – I’ll leave it until tomorrow to tell you why…

P.s. If you made it all the way to end of this (well done, and thank you for bearing with me) you might have noticed that I started every paragraph with the word ‘So.’ I didn’t do it because I don’t know any other words (I promise I do!) I did it because if somebody starts a conversation by saying ‘So…’ it’s supposed to signify that while they don’t necessarily have anything useful to say, they subconsciously want to keep talking to you anyway. Pretty neat, right?
(Oh, and now I’ve pointed that out to you, you’ll notice how ridiculously often people do it.)